7 Steps to Build –and Keep- a Positive Mindset

The power of a positive mindset –or positive thinking- is a trendy concept, almost a cliché, but not for that any less real. Its mental and physical benefits have been proved and demonstrated by many scientific studies; it can give you more confidence, improve your mood, and reduce the risk of developing hypertension, depression, and other stress-related issues.

So far, so good, but how can we build and maintain such a positive mindset?

Here’s a list of seven steps to take to accomplish that goal:

1. Start your day with positive affirmations. The actions you take in the morning set the tone for the rest of the day; go to the mirror and say to yourself: “today is going to be a great day,” or “I’m going to be awesome today,” and watch in amazement how your day will improve.

2. Keep your focus on the good things. There’s no such thing as a perfect day; whenever you bump into an obstacle, look for the good in that situation, no matter how small.

3. Look for the funny side in bad situations. We’re used to saying, “someday we’re going to look back on this situation, and laugh,” so, why wait? Just by looking at it with a smile, the way out or through the situation will show faster and clearly.

4. Turn failures into lessons. Mistakes are always going to happen, so instead of focusing on the failure, think about what you’re going to do –or not do- next time, and create a roadmap highlighting highways, shortcuts, roadblocks, and bumps.

5. Transform your negative self-talk into a coach. Your negative self-talk usually creeps up unnoticed, and soon it turns into internalized feelings that reinforce your conceptions of yourself. We have to turn our inner critic into an inner coach, so thoughts like “I’m so bad at this” become “once I get more practice, I’ll be great at this.”

6. Focus on the present. We need to live the moment. Most negativity sources come from a memory of a recent event or the exaggerated visualization of a potential future event.

7. Surround yourself with positive people and environment. When we do that, we hear positive outlooks, stories, and affirmations; their positive words and actions will sink in and affect our own line of thinking, words, and actions.

Everyone, no matter the situation, can take these steps and increase their positive attitude.

A positive mindset will always offer compounding returns, so the more often we practice it, the more significant benefits we’ll collect.

Stay strong!

Simple ways to find your smile every day

Don’t wait to be happy

There are always reasons to be happy. Happy times are coming and going like trains in a train station; sometimes, they are right there right in front of your eyes, waiting for you to shift your focus and notice and appreciate them.

Whatever is going on around you, you can feel happy, be productive, create success, and enjoy yourself; all you have to do is change your focus and the way you think.

Create your happy moments

We all dream of being happy someday, but only when the conditions are right. Until then, we’re overworked, overstressed, and less than pleased. We create a utopian destination out of something that should be part of the journey.

If we don’t train ourselves to feel happy along the way, what makes us think we will feel it when we get there? Happiness is an emotion we can create by setting ourselves up with the right state (mental, emotional, and physical) to build momentum, and when those ‘right conditions’ are met, we’ll be there already.

Get in a happy state

A joyful life is the best kind of life we can hope to achieve. It creates those positive, feel-good vibes and allows us to look to the future with optimism. Bliss and pure joy seem like ephemeral emotions, but we can learn to hold on to it and relish in it and eventually create it at will.

In short, stop worrying so much, appreciate all the small things (and the big things you may be missing out too), surround yourself with positive, loving people, smile more, laugh more, hug more, and love more…

After all, what can be better than that?


Stay strong!

Your Peak State is the Key to Everything!

State is the most important aspect of personal development. You could dismiss every topic en every PD program available and only take State into practice, and you’ll still have the most powerful tool in the toolbox at your disposal.

But what is State? It’s the way you feel at any given moment, physically, emotionally, and mentally.

Your edge in life depends 80% on your psychology, and the other 20% on the mechanics of habits. That is a force at work at all times, and it doesn’t care about what it does to you; it just works that way, like gravity… it can work to your advantage and amusement, or it can seriously hurt you; but hey, it’s not personal, it’s just the way it works.

But if you could take control of this force, by controlling your consistent emotions, you could begin to consciously and deliberately reshape your daily experience of life.

Living in a peak State is exhilarating, and life-changing, yet it’s still a rare condition for most people.

It doesn’t have to be the case for you.

How do you raise your life to this level then?

It will require first that you let go of the past, master your emotions, and adopt an excellence mindset.

Your emotions are the foundation that peak State is built upon. They have the power to control everything in our lives –mood, decisions, actions, you name it. If you want positive progress, you need positive emotions.

The Triad of Emotional Psychology

 To start creating a positive mindset, you need to understand first the Triad of Emotional Psychology and master the three forces that control your emotions: your physiology, your language, and your focus.

1. Your Physiology

This is the first component of the Triad. It refers to your body and all its systems.

The way you use your body affects how you feel mentally and emotionally. You must be aware of this connection: if you stand up straight, you’ll feel a sense of pride and alertness; if you slump over and neglect your body, you’ll start to feel down and negative –and consider what will happen if you get into the habit of doing any of these consistently…

The next time you find yourself in a certain mood, pay attention to your body and how you’re using it at that moment, and you’ll start to make the connection, and in no time you will start being able to change it as well.

You have the power to reset your State at will.

1. Your Focus

Wherever your focus goes, your energy will flow. What you put your focus on is where you’ll set your intention; consciously or unconsciously.

If you are driving on the highway and turn your head and your attention completely to your left –and hear me well, don’t try that; especially on the highway!– you will notice that your car will steer to the left; not by itself, of course, but by a combination of your focusing your attention to that direction and moving dominant parts of your body as well. This is why we know of so many cases of unconfident drivers crashing their car into the only tree or telephone pole in sight; they see it, begin to fear crashing into it, and they involuntarily steer right into it.

The same thing happens to you in other aspects.

Learning to set your focus on the positive things is one of the most essential steps toward achieving your peak State, and you will also start moving in the direction of the things you do want.

1. Your Language

This is the third component of the Triad. The way you speak –to yourself internally and out loud- determines how you operate in the world; especially the questions you ask.

Your brain is programmed to come up with an answer to whatever question is presented to it; so, if you were to ask “how come all these bad things happen to me?”, or “why is it that I can never make enough money?”, then your brain will come up with whatever answer could fit that question, and it doesn’t matter if it is real, it will match your current set of beliefs, and you’ll feel powerless as a result.

The way you talk to yourself will determine what emotions you feel, so choose your words and your tone wisely. You will still be talking to yourself internally; but instead of having a negative, judgmental character disapproving everything you do, you can have a coach showing you a better, most effective way to do things next time. You will benefit from the feedback, and you’d have learned something as well.

Reprogram your usual phrases through repetition, using what we call incantations. When you repeat a phrase with enough emotional intensity, you start to believe and embody it (just as with your lousy self-talk). Use the power of incantations by designing and using the ones that support you the most.

Let’s continue this topic next week.
Until then, stay strong!

Design your Week, Control your Time!

In life you have two choices; you either float through it by accident, dragged by its currents and moods, or you can do it on-purpose taking control of the helm and setting a course of your own design.

You can be reactive, or proactive… what’s it going to be?

Of course, I know; you cannot plan for everything. There are events you cannot anticipate, but it is a hell of a lot easier to get to your destination when you are proactive and have your destination in mind; and one great way to approach this strategy is by creating your Ideal Week, kind of a chart and a compass to steer you in the right direction.

I first heard of this concept from author, coach, and speaker Donald Miller, who originally heard it from his coach. The idea is similar to a financial budget; only in this one, you will plan how you will manage your time instead of your money.

 

Setting your Plan

In anyone’s ideal week –that is, the week you would live if you could control everything that happens to you- should be divided into a simple grid, so each day of the week has a main theme (listed at the top of the planner), and each day also is segmented into blocks, related to a specific focus area.

 

Themes

For instance, on an Ideal Week, the themes for the days of the week could be:

• Mondays could be Teams (one-on-one meetings, staff meetings, and general planning)

• Tuesdays and Wednesdays, Outside Tasks (travel, extended meetings, client visits, etc.)

• Thursdays could be Problem Solving days

• Fridays could be spent on medium and long-term planning

• Saturdays are for personal/recreational activities

• Sundays for rest, family, and spirituality

 

Focus Areas

It’s important to notice that there is no limit to the variety of things you can achieve if only you create firm boundaries around your time blocks and focus areas. If you don’t set them apart, work –it is mostly the case- will expand to the time allotted for it.

• Early mornings are reserved for self-nurturing activities (reading, meditating, working out)

• Middle morning to late afternoon is for work.

• The end of the day is reserved for family time and home (cooking, dining, writing, etc.); it’s a time to connect and catch up.

You can use some kind of color scheme to highlight or even chunk things down a little bit more. It’s all subjective, you can create your own scheme, as long as you make sure you’re working on what matters most.

Map your ideal week, and use it constantly to check whether you’re on course, or off course. Not always you’ll accomplish 100% of your weekly goals, but it will give you something to shoot for; and hey, hitting half percent of a perfectly designed week plan is an unbelievable productive week!

If you take on your weekly chunk of activities without knowing what your priorities are, and just ‘move forward’, you’re actually moving sideways or going around in circles. Unless you have a laser focus aim, you’re going to miss your target.

 

Remember, if you aim small, you’ll miss small.
Stay on target, stay strong!

Self-Confidence, the shortcut to Your Dream Life

Everything that you have in your life is the result of your beliefs, in yourself and in what is possible.

Learning to believe in yourself will open up countless possibilities in your life. Although this is not an easy task, since we’ve been conditioned from our childhood to doubt ourselves, we must learn to get rid of our fears and self-doubt to rebuild our self-esteem and self-confidence.

These are four important steps to learn how to achieve it. If you practice them consistently and relentlessly, you’ll be amazed at the results.

 

1. Everything you want is possible.

It is your choice whether or not to believe that what you want is possible.

We used to believe that humans responded to information coming into the brain from the outside, but now we know that instead, we tend to respond to what the brain expects to happen next, based on previous experiences.

Our brain is a complex and powerful instrument. Whatever you expect, it will work to obtain it. It can deliver everything you believe in through the power of expectation; that’s why it is very important to always hold a positive expectation instead of rehearsing for the things we don’t want to happen.

 

2. See what you want, get what you see

When you add a visualization practice to your daily routine, you’ll naturally become more inspired to work on your goals. You’ll surprise yourself by spontaneously doing things that move you closer to your ideal life. You’ll take on more responsibilities, ask more directly, and taking risks; thus experiencing bigger pay-offs.

One of the most common and effective ways to work with visualization is with an inspirational Vision Board –a graphic representation of what you want in life. When you look at it every day, you start to shift your focus towards your dreams.

 

3. Act as if. Who do you want to be?

The best way to establish a successful mindset is to act as if you’ve already become the kind of person you want to be.

Imagine you’ve already achieved your dream.
What kind of person would you be? What kind of people would surround you? How would you dress? How would you act, and treat others? What kind of growth and contribution would you be experiencing consistently?

Whatever actions you’d identify with, don’t wait; start taking them now.
By acting this way, you’ll become the kind of person who is capable of creating the successful life that you want, and it will trigger your subconscious mind to find creative ways to achieve the required goals.

 

4. Take action, move towards your goals!

Believe it or not, this is where most people get stuck. They all get the principles, they set their goals, say their affirmations, and do their visualizations; but they never get results because they fail to take action on them.

The final and most important step of all is to take action. It’s ok to feel the fear and do it anyway, because that’s where the life of our dreams lay, right across the walls of fear.

 

So, be strong, take action, climb up that wall, and run towards your dreams!

Master Your Psychology and Stop Living in Fear

Fear can be useful and it has its place in our healthy behavior; but if you let it, it can keep us locked up inside what is comfortable or predictable –a cage, which is where most of us are living these days.

Living in the seemingly ‘safe’ state which fear always tends to take us to, makes us feel unfulfilled with the status quo in the end, yet afraid of going after anything different, which most of the time would be something better.

If you want to stop living in fear, you must understand how it works so you can actively fight against it.
Fear is a normal emotion that warns us against potential threats to our safety, but nowadays, in our mostly cosmetic and safeguarded society, it may have become a chronic or hypersensitive response.

You can blame it on the media, a specific situation, caffeine excess; yet blaming has never helped anyone solve their problems.

It is time to OWN YOUR EMOTIONS and transform your life.

Where’s this fear coming from?

When we’re living in a constant state of fear, our anxieties are running the show; we’re constantly worrying without much mindfulness as to what’s causing it. You have to identify what is causing our distress.

Try brainstorming a list of all your tangible concerns (your kids could get hurt, fear of death, etc.) and another of those not that tangible (economic collapse, etc.) and then write a few actions you can take to prevent them from happening. That will give you a sense of control to start with.

Realize that life happens FOR you, not to you.

Understanding and accepting this notion is the first step to fulfillment, and it will put an end to the blaming game and let you start taking charge of your destiny.
Then, endless possibilities will open up to you.

Enough with the excuses

Same as blame, excuses are a lame defense mechanism we use to avoid taking responsibility from our problems and our life in general, and they tend to push our hopes, desires and dreams aside. Excuses are comforting when we’re living in fear, they are safe; but they also bring you back to that starting point where everything is old, done, achieved. There are no challenges there, no growth.
Next time some excuse comes floating into your mind, ask yourself: are you where you want to be in life? Or are you falling back on fear and choosing comfort instead of facing your challenges?

Focus on Growth

We tend to give up because we don’t believe we can achieve our goals, that they’re beyond our capabilities. You must know that your abilities are not fixed, they’re flexible, and just as with muscles, they grow stronger with practice and repetition, and by taking more than they can handle at the time.
It’s like the Crocodile Dundee actor said once: “the secret of my success is that I bite more than I can chew, and then chew as fast as I can”.
Find new ways to adapt, and work hard to overcome whatever life puts in your way.

Everything is a learning experience

Everybody come across difficulties from time to time. The most painful experiences are those which help us redefine what you want and don’t want in life.
Failure, disappointment, roadblocks; they can all be used as a reflecting tool to learn more about yourself and what you want out of your life.

Next time you’re facing a painful experience and you’re ready to give up, take a moment and decide that your dreams are more important than your fear.

Make that decision today and master your fears, start living as the most joyful, successful version of yourself.

Stay strong!

YOU can create your reality.

I know it’s hard to see and appreciate this fact, especially these days when we all feel like everything we know is spinning out of our control.

You may feel powerless to control what’s happening to you and all around you; anxious about your financial situation, your job, your health, family, relationships, and loved ones.

We’re all dealing with a lot for sure.

But especially now, it’s important that you get to choose how you’re going to show up.

You get to choose… Hope or despair, action or collapse, bravery shaping your future, or fear paralyzing you.

You will attract into your life whatever you focus on; whatever you give your attention and energy to, will come back to you.

 

This is how things work. Like attracts like. You may believe it or not, but it wouldn’t matter (the same way it wouldn’t matter whether or not you believe in the law of gravity; if you take a step off a ledge, you’re going to fall).

If you are feeling anxious, stressed out, angry or afraid, you’re sending out that negative energy and it will come back to you.

On the other hand, if you are feeling excited, enthusiastic, passionate, hopeful, joyful, you name it… then you’re sending out positive energy, and it will also come back to you.

The universe will respond to both of these vibrations. It doesn’t decide or evaluate which one is better for you, it just responds to whatever you’re creating and sending out, and it gives you more of the same… you always get what you give.

Your thoughts have a specific vibration that will attract whatever vibrates in the same frequency.

Whatever you’re thinking and feeling at any given time is your undeniable request to the universe, and it will respond every time; no exceptions.

If you want to take control of your life, you need to make sure that your thoughts and feelings are aligned with those of the things and experiences you want to have.

If joy and happiness are what you want to attract, then you need to start having thoughts and feelings of joy and happiness now so, just like a radio, your frequency is in tune to receive them.

Once you understand and accept how this works, you will start to consciously and intentionally create a better life.

 

So, what’s it going to be?

Life has just presented you with a unique opportunity to start showing up as the best version of yourself, and develop the skills you need to come through this current challenging experience more resilient, more capable, and more focused on achieving success than ever before!

Will you rise to meet the challenge?

 

See you next week.
Stay strong!

 

 

Fear is Contagious, but so is Calm

Can you keep cool when everything around you is in turmoil?

Have you been so afraid you couldn’t think or move? Have you ever felt irrational fear or panic?

Extreme fear makes us freeze both our minds and our bodies; and it makes us lose control over our emotions. When this fear extends over time, it makes simple, everyday tasks feel like an impossible goal.

 

Learning how to get rid of anxiety is essential to living a normal life so we’re not tied down by hesitation and distress.

We have things to take care of, goals and dreams; and it’s likely we have people who depend on us too, whether it is because we’re parents, teachers, community or business leaders, people will look up to us and mimic our behavior. If we’re doing it right, they are going to do it right as well, or even better. But if we’re doing it wrong, they are going to tank. Guaranteed.

Fear is a contagious emotion; I we have it, suddenly everyone around us will have it as well. we can’t just run around running like a chicken with its head cut off, screaming at people or pulling our hairs like mad men; no one can perform like this.

 

Fear is contagious, but so is calm. If we keep your head, others around us are going to keep theirs too.

This is a great gift, particularly for a leader. We might be churning under the water, but on the surface, we got that calm for others to see and imitate; and guess what? After a time, it also gets to us! We also get infected by it.

 

We can get rid of that fear and anxiety.

This type of fear we’re all experiencing these days is just another way we make meaning of the world around us. When we’re in a dangerous or stressful situation, fear and anxiety are extremely useful emotions; they heighten our senses and prepare us for “fight or flight”. But if we’re just living our day-to-day lives, these emotions are not so helpful.

Everyone deals with fear differently. You may never get rid of fear entirely, but you can learn how to handle anxiety so it doesn’t control our lives; we can feel the fear and do things anyway.

 

So, how can we do it?

We can change our physical state, changing our focus, the way we move, the scenery and getting our heart rate up with some kind of exercise can often be enough to give us the clarity we need.

Create and maintain healthy habits. Our minds and physical bodies are deeply connected. We need to cut out bad habits that only mask the real causes of our anxiety.

Learn relaxation techniques. Meditation is proven to reduce anxiety, depression and even physical pain. It trains your brain to live in the moment, letting go of the past and not worrying about the future.

Finally, learn how to leverage our fear. One of the best ways to defeat anxiety is to understand how to leverage fear. Successful people are also afraid, only they are more afraid of what they’d miss if they don’t do whatever it takes in order to live a rich, fulfilling life. Instead of being crippled by fear and anxiety, they use it to fuel their actions further toward the achievement of their goals.

 

Think about that.
Stay safe, stay strong.

Tapping into an Exciting, Purpose-driven Sense of Confidence

Have you ever had one of those days in which you practically jumped out of bed in a great mood and the entire day went down just like you wanted it?

Have you ever experienced just the opposite?

 

The way you feel is the direct result of your state of mind.

If you are always stressed and worried, you will live in a depressed state, feeling like you can’t get do anything right, like your whole life is going downhill; and your confidence will take a hit.

On the other hand, if you’re consistently in a state of gratitude, love, and joy, you are going to be living in an amazing, upbeat state in which nothing gets you out of your game. You will move through your day with purpose and enthusiasm, building your self-confidence as you go along.

 

Now, how do we reach or create these very different states?

By acknowledging your emotions.

If you let them control your feelings without you knowing why you are feeling that particular way, they will end up controlling your actions.

This can eventually become a habit that can affect you every day.

When you’re driven by a sense of well-being, you’ll radiate happiness and confidence; but when you’re obstructed by negativity, those around you will sense it and react accordingly.

So, how can you avoid it?

First, by recognizing that you are in control of how you feel, including confidence. Confidence is not something you’re born with and just have; it’s something you build over time and work. It’s the feeling of certainty that you can accomplish whatever you set out to do. It’s like any other emotion, it’s a way of feeling you can train yourself into at any time.

 

What is your purpose?

Why is confidence important to you? Do you interact with a huge number of people? Are you a manager or a CEO and need to present a strong sense of leadership? Perhaps to make a good first impression in a relationship?

Whatever it may be, you need to know exactly why you want to achieve it. Once you know it, it’s just a matter of retraining your brain to present yourself as a confident person. Disregard the negative thoughts, uncertainty, hesitance, and second-guessing that held you back before, that would only lead you to doubt and fear. Your mind and body will begin a positive feedback loop; they will take the hint and would stand straighter, stop fidgeting, and present the best version of yourself.

 

What turns you on?

There’s a way to help you figure out how to build confidence even when you’re at your lowest point ever: think about something in you or those around you that you’re grateful and proud of.
Remember a recent accomplishment, something you did at work that turned out incredible, or helping a family member or a friend…

Whatever it is, it’s something you get done, no one else. That’s worth celebrating.

Recognizing this accomplishment and your ability to reproduce it will instantly raise your mood and allow you to create some incredible levels of confidence.

With this, you’re retraining your mind to think in positive terms instead of negative ones…. ‘If I did all that, what can hold me back from achieving this new goal?’

Evoking moments of pride will help you to see the big picture more clearly, and as you practice tapping into it more often, you’ll start believing in your own abilities, and will be able to access those feelings of well-being and pride any time at will.

 

You’re in charge of your emotions, and you can use them to shape your life in any way you choose to.

 

 

Stay strong!

 

 

 

 

 

Get Your Mind Out of its Own Barricade

If you count yourself as a regular human being these days, the odds are you’ve been through a mental block from time to time. You might feel stuck in an unwanted job, an unfulfilled relationship, or a general discontent with daily life.

Having your mind trapped in its own barricade is a very frustrating experience, and it can impact all aspects of your life if allowed to continue over time.

There are many causes for this kind of mental block, overanalyzing everything, overloading yourself with too many responsibilities, just to name some common few.

In order to overcome that kind of stalled mindset, you first need to understand what a mental block is.

 

What is a mental block?

It could be defined as a range of experiences related to feeling obstructed to perform mental processes. You may have heard of it also in terms like “brain fog”, writer’s block”, or “stumbling block”; but they all refer to the same state: inability to concentrate, think or reason clearly, resulting in a lack of drive.

No matter how it is described, if you don’t learn how to get over it, it can derail your productivity and feeling of contentment with life.

 

How to get over it?

The most effective strategies to get rid of mental blocks work on the root of what keeps people stuck:

 

Re-take control of your state

In order to regain momentum, get your mind and your body back in harmony and reach your peak state. Sometimes, a little physical activity is all it takes to break a mental block.

Remember, your “state” is nothing more than the framework you operate out in life. Use it to your advantage.

 

Bring your focus back to the present

It’s all about mind over matter.

If you’re experiencing a mental block, chances are you’re focusing your attention on the past or the future, riddling yourself with guilt or concerns for things to come.

Take a few minutes to sit and think about the present moment. Use your breathing as a focal point until your mind starts to calm down. From that peaceful state, you’ll be able to think more clearly and get into a problem-solving state more easily.

 

 

Sometimes, as unlikely as it might sound, the more frustrated you feel, the closer a breakthrough is.

You may feel a general discontent in life like your crap-filter is full and you can’t take any more of it; something’s gotta give.

Know that those feelings are normal as you grow and evolve to overcome obstacles in your life.

They are there to let you know that your breakthrough is right around the corner!